by Rahul Toulsien
It is quite normal after a split to wonder how to get someone back, especially if it was you who was the "victim" and the split was a surprise. Those feeling of loss and helplessness are most unpleasant and difficult to master.
While most relationship experts will tell you to simply accept the situation and move on, we are going to talk about another option. But before we begin, it is important to explain that we do not advocate any kind improper behaviour and that these instructions are merely meant to instruct men and women who believe that reconciliation is a real possibility.
Though there are no reliable statistics, experts estimate that one in four couples get back together after a break-up. The reasons that most couples decide to give it another try is simple: they still have feelings for each other.
Adopting the correct attitude is vital if you want to know how to get somone back. If you are not truly committed to the relationship, or if you just don't want to be on your own are not reasons to get an ex back. The first step to getting someone back is honesty - with yourself and your ex.
Broadly there are three main areas that cause relationship breakups which are unfaithfulness, a reluctance by one or both parties to commit, and in some cases difficult behaviour.
By behavioural characteristics we mean one partner spending too much time out with friends, drinking too much, drug taking etc. All those things that prevent couples spending time together. It's imperative that if these are things that have affected your relationship, a decision to change must be made. Only time will convince your partner that you have changed however.
Sometimes it's simply a matter of making a commitment (or not). Commitment is the ultimate test of a relationship at any stage. For example, if you are a member of a certain club, say golf, is it reasonable, as your relationship deepens, to play every Saturday afternoon? This goes as far as getting married - are you serious about this relationship, or are there more important things in your life? If the relationship is the most important, changes to your lifestyle will have to be made, before your partner decides to leave.
The final and most serious problem in relationships is undoubtedly infidelity. Few couples, especially unmarried ones, stay together after someone confesses to cheating. Is it possible to learn how to get someone back after you were unfaithful? The answer is yes, but it isn't going to be easy. After all, once faith and trust have been broken, it can be difficult to repair.
This is a real test of your partner's love for you. Apologising will not bring her back instantly, space to think is needed and if you afford them that there's a chance they'll take you back.
All three of these situations require a detailed plan if you are serious on finding out how to get someone back. Small articles are fine, but if you're looking for a resource with detailed advice and help, visit www.loveofrelationships.com Don't reprint this exact article. Instead, reprint a free unique content version of this same article.
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